The b*tch that launched a Substack

or How I learned to have anxiety and live again Part I

Mental Health can be a b*tch.

Hopefully that got your attention. On Thanksgiving in 2024, I went to the ER with symptoms of a heart attack. I was not, in fact, having a heart attack. All signs were good and I was released.

3 Days later, I was not well with the same heart attack like symptoms plus stomach pains. Oof. At the grand ol’ age of 43 too. EKGs, CT scans and Ultrasounds later, all physical signs were good and I was released.

Playing the odds, I was actually panicking. I was having anxiety. There isn’t a physical test to tell you this.

So what do you do?

- Sign up with a therapist. I did. In fact, I signed up with the company my wife works for. Added bonus to provide her with direct feedback

- Talk to your PCP as well. Between your therapist/PCP, medication may be in order. My PCP thought so and I was placed on Lexapro. The thing about medication though is that everyone tolerates them differently and with this specific pill, I was getting the side effects.

It may have taken a couple days for side effects to kick-in, but they did. Bloating/gas, pain, almost complete loss of appetite, etc. After two days of not getting better and starting to miss out on events at home and days at work, I was back in the ER for support and off the Lexapro.

- I have also started a Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) online learning program that is quite useful in managing stress, worry and anxiety. I can’t stress enough that even when there are setbacks like not taking to medication, continuing to work with your available resources of PCP, Therapist and self-paced programs like CBT are your best options for improvement.

It can be hard, especially half-way through life, to be able to accept the need for Mental Support. It’s even statistically more harder for men to do so. BUT DO IT.

Your friends, family, colleagues will ultimately be supportive. But your care team of PCP and Therapist will be the differentiator needed.

I’m not on meds at the moment but I have some anxiety “as needed” pills that do not affect me. I’m continuing with the program and doing the work because I don’t want to be in the ER again. I’ll never understand what triggered these events now but I’m damn sure going to do everything I can to best manage the situation when it next thinks to present itself.

I appreciate all the support.

This message was originally shared on Facebook and LinkedIn on December 14, 2024. It is shared here as a snapshot of the journey that leads to this Substack and to you, As You Find Me.